|Seabrook, NH – I’m leaving behind my two sons Zackary and Damian Quintiliani, their father John Quintiliani. My wife, Lindsay Thornell. They’re all my whole heart, my best friends, my whole world.
Life is tricky people and there is no prejudice when it comes to the unknown. I was diagnosed with ALS on February 7, 2020. My entire world got flipped and my future was instantly taken away. My children were faced with a future without their Mom. Their father was instantly faced with a future without his best friend, mother of his children. My wife, after a life long friendship and finally giving us a chance, losing her rock, her whole heart.
There are stages one goes through when given 2-5 years to live. First, anger! Anger at all the people that doubted you. The ones who questioned weather you were actually sick, because they were still stuck in your past. The ones who were incapable of giving you the benefit of the doubt, because it was easier for them to doubt you than accept your life will end and they will never be able to be a part of it again. Their guilt is eating them, let it; that’s on them. Second, depression! I don’t think that needs an explanation. Depression hits hard and hiding from the world becomes a constant in your life. Third, acceptance! You come to terms with your diagnosis, you make decisions you never think about; like weather to let machines keep you alive or signing a DNR. With acceptance comes major reality checks. You find out truly who your family is, who your friends are and you start to realize your circle is honestly smaller than you ever thought. Then you realize that the smaller circle is all you ever truly needed in life.
My advice to the world is to just do you! Focus on your circle. Accept nobody in your world that doubts your hopes and dreams. Don’t allow others to make you question yourself, your truth. Know that you can be a better you and let the people who stay stuck in your past, go. You’re not going to be able to grow if you allow the negative people to continue whispering in your ear.